


Red Tape

by Baneberry



Category: Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Animated (2007)
Genre: Aphrodisiacs, Crack, Dubious Consent, M/M, Other, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Slime monster, Sticky Sexual Interfacing, Tentacle Sex, Tentacles, Xenophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-01-02
Packaged: 2018-05-11 02:53:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5611144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Baneberry/pseuds/Baneberry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In order to win the alliance of an alien race, Cliffjumper and Mirage have to cut through a little bureaucratic red tape. So to speak.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Red Tape

**Author's Note:**

> This is a request from a friend! Something involving any universe Cliffjumper/Mirage with the prompt "slime." I decided TFA, and went crazy. This is for you, J, you equally terrible pervert.
> 
> While consented, I'm still gonna apply a dubcon tag to play it safe.
> 
> Apologies for sloppiness. Not the intentional sloppiness, though.
> 
> [Tumblr link](http://captainbaneberry.tumblr.com/post/136446514853/red-tape-baneberry-transformers-all-media): because a reblog is always appreciated! （●>ω・）ﾉ

"Look, it's not that bad."

Cliffjumper's optics widened so big they almost bugged from his cranial chamber. He looked mortified and astonished at Mirage's comment, as if Mirage had said something so utterly and completely stupid, some cosmic being somewhere actually died from just how ridiculous it was. "'Not that bad'?" Cliffjumper growled, his blue optics brightening, cheeks getting hotter. "' _Not that bad_ '!?"

Mirage shrugged. Slightly. It was a bit difficult, considering his position--which was somewhat identical to Cliffjumper's own. Both mechs were lifted off the ground, held in place by a giant, shimmering blob of jelly-like green slime. It was alive, somehow, but neither knew if it was sapient. The mass of slime bound them with ropes and tentacles made of the same dripping substance.

Cliffjumper had his arms forced behind his back, a tendril around his waist. Mirage's hands were held above his head, a tentacle wrapped around each of his thighs. Down below, the court of insectoid aliens watched in awe and anticipation.

"What about this situation is 'not that bad'!?" Cliffjumper snapped. The jelly gurgled; it made strange noises every now and then. Gurgles mostly.

"We have to do this, Cliffjumper," Mirage insisted, "it's the only way we're going to win their trust. This is part of their traditions; their customs. We have to show them respect. Besides, Sentinel Magnus said we cannot return without their pledge."

Cliffjumper spat. "I don't want to ally myself with these freaks!" His arms strained in the jelly tentacles. Another tendril slowly slithered toward a leg, and he kicked at it clumsily. "No!"

Mirage exvented. He was remarkably calm, despite everything. Cliffjumper did not know how he did it, but he was beginning to suspect some things... Like his bondmate was a kinky freak, maybe. "As soon as we get this over with, we can speak to their king and negotiate an alliance," he said, nodding at the giant insectoid sitting toward the front of the open coliseum. The slime monster was simply too big for any room.

"How does this get us anywhere!?"

"This is how they test us. We need to earn their trust; this is how we do it. Besides," Mirage chuckled, shrugging, "you've been frisked before. Just... imagine being frisked by... sentient slime. And, well... interfacing..."

Cliffjumper writhed in the tentacles, shrieking. Mirage, however, stayed quiet this time. Eventually Cliffjumper stopped his struggling, going into bitter sulk mode. "Sentinel Magnus's orders?" he grumbled hatefully.

Mirage nodded. He smiled crookedly at his partner. "Sentinel Magnus's orders."

Cliffjumper never once doubted his place as an Autobot. He loved being an Autobot. But right now... If ever he felt unsure of his alliance, it was now. Sentinel Magnus probably didn't know they'd have to go through _this_ , but Sentinel was no Ultra Magnus. Even Cliffjumper knew he wasn't that suited for the role. But far be it for Cliffjumper to question his superiors, or the Autobot cause, and if getting the Mucous on their side for extra manpower and support meant going through this weird initiation process...

"Fine!" Cliffjumper kicked his legs. "Fraggit. Fine! Just--just hurry this up!"

Mirage exvented, relieved. He glanced down at the Mucous king and nodded. The insectoid slammed his staff down on the ground twice, then raised it. The crowds cheered for one whole minute, then instantly fell silent.

Mirage and Cliffjumper stiffened as the blob holding them groaned loudly, expanding. More tentacles grew from its core mass. They moved like inquisitive snakes over to the two aliens, Cliffjumper glaring at them. He did his best not to kick or struggle, but when one caressed his cheek, he instinctively jerked his head away.

A tentacle emerged from between Mirage's legs, rising until its edge was inches from the Autobot's face.

Mirage blinked.

The end of the tentacle split open then, abruptly spitting a wad of something white and gooey on Mirage's face. He heard a yelp-snarl and knew his partner had just gotten the same. Mirage slowly opened his optics, blinking away some of the goo. He could taste a little in his mouth--sweet, actually.

"It's in my eyes! It--it got in my mouth!" Cliffjumper spit and hissed and spit some more. "Dammit, you spawnuvva--c'mere!" He flailed his legs, attempting to propel himself forward to fight the tentacle.

"Calm down," Mirage said, shaking his head. Most of the goo fell off, splattering against the surrounding slime. He shyly licked the corner of his mouth. It... really did taste quite good. "I'm sure it's nothing. It's probably just a way of saying hell--oooh!"

Mirage arched back as two tentacles slid up his legs, burrowing into hip and groin seams. Cliffjumper glanced back at his partner, concerned; a tentacle wound up the red Minibot's chest, kneading around his front window. 

"Wah!"

Soon, numerous tentacles were crawling along their bodies, exploring. Probing seams, feeling up armor and plating and biolights.

"They're s-studying us," Mirage said, optics flushed, "s-seeing what we're m-made of."

"C-Could have j-just asked!" Cliffjumper whined, a tentacle poking him between the optics.

Mirage went quiet again, Cliffjumper doing all the yelling and pissed off noises for the both of them. Truth was, however, he was a little... embarrassed. This actually didn't feel bad, at all. In fact, the sticky slime felt... good. It was cool to the touch, but warmed up quick, and every time it poked and prodded, it did so playfully, gently, never eliciting pain. He hoped Cliffjumper hadn't noticed him going lax, kind of... leaning into a few of the tentacles petting his torso.

And Mirage almost didn't hear it. Almost. Just before he could lose himself to this strange, alien pleasure, he heard Cliffjumper moan. But it wasn't an ordinary moan; not one made of frustration, either. It was deep, heavy--aroused. 

Mirage snapped his head back, optics wide. Sure enough, Cliffjumper seemed to have calmed down; the glare on his face had weakened, his gaze half-lidded and browplates twitching. The tentacles weren't doing anything special; nothing different from what they were doing with Mirage.

That made him feel a little better. Maybe he wasn't the only kinky one after a--

Then it hit him. Like a punch to the face that felt more like a hard kiss on the mouth. Mirage gasped, wiggling in the tentacles before relaxing; his blue optics turned violet, white apertures blown wide. His circuits were warm, like every bit of plating and piece of armor on his very sensitive, very aroused frame.

"O-Oh..." Mirage smiled. It was soggy and crooked. His head was light. "Oooh... I--I see..."

Cliffjumper was exventing heavily, mouth open. He shivered. "W-What?" he croaked. His own optics were the same vibrant purple.

"It was... t-the goo... It was--ah!" Mirage squealed as a tentacle pressed down against his pelvic plating. Without thinking, he opened his codpiece, barely surprised to find he was already leaking lubricant. The tentacle floated inquisitively over his open, flaring channel. "Aphro... Aphrodisiac..."

Cliffjumper blinked. "A wha?" He looked down at the rustling and gurgling between his legs. Two tentacles were tugging gently at his pelvic armor. He didn't know why, but he opened it, let them see his exposed channel. It just felt like the right thing to do. Then he remembered what Mirage said in all the fog. "Aphrodisiac? I-It drugged us?"

It was too late. Mirage, alas, was already too far gone, lost to the heady lust. A tentacle pressed up against his engorged channel lips, and started rubbing, moving back and forth in deep, heavy strokes that sent wonderful ripples of pleasure through Mirage's body. The blue Autobot gasped, head thrown back; his thighs twitched, the tentacles around them parting his legs a little wider. The tentacle kept a slow pace, every once and a while increasing for a few strokes and causing Mirage to jerk and whimper.

Cliffjumper's spark pulsed furiously in his chest. His unit pressurized instantly, popping out. A tentacle immediately wrapped itself around the small, chubby cord, and squeezed. Cliffjumper yelped; he was tilted back, couldn't see another tentacle move in from below and slip its edge just slightly into his channel until it found his anterior node. It paused a moment, almost as if thinking, before flicking the node--once, twice, again and again, and Cliffjumper was close to sobbing, optics rolling back in his head.

Meanwhile, the insectoid aliens watched on in utter silence.

"It's so... s-so..." Mirage struggled to find the words. Find his voice. He couldn't think; he didn't want to think. He watched the tentacle increase its pace until his hips were rocking with the motion. He smiled widely, tongue lolling to the side. "Y-Yes. I-It's so... so _wonderful_..." he whimpered, biting down on his bottom lip.

Cliffjumper vented heavily. "I-I can't--I can't--" He felt all tension leave his struts, until he was practically a ragdoll, limp in the tentacles' grasp. Then, slowly... a grin. A lazy grin that matched his hooded optics. "I-I'm s-still m... mm..." The word was "mad," and he wasn't, not really. His grin didn't last long when the tentacle flicking his anterior node went faster, almost vibrating. He keened, head jerking back, coolant spilling from one corner of his mouth.

"M-More, m-more p-please..." Mirage begged. He sounded desperate, needy, excited. He'd be embarrassed later. As if the slime monster understood him, the tentacle rose from his channel, lining up. Mirage's spark skipped a pulse; he held his breath, exhilarated; he knew what this meant. The tentacles around his legs widened them just a little bit... The tentacle thrust inside Mirage, already open and ready.

Mirage screamed with delight, coolant flying from the corners of his optics. "Y-Yes! Yes!" he cheered. The tentacle started pumping, going deep and grinding into every single node. It pushed as far as it could, until Mirage could feel the burn of being stretched too wide.

Yet it didn't feel like enough, not nearly enough.

Cliffjumper felt the tentacles around him loosen. Cool wind on his cheeks and throbbing hot channel as he was dropped in the air a good ten feet. Caught again by different tentacles. They re-positioned him: one tentacle around the waist, another wrapped around his wrists and holding out his arms. Two more coiled around his knees, spreading his legs.

Cliffjumper glanced back at the tentacle hovering above his channel. He opened his mouth, went to say something--though he wasn't sure what--when the tentacle pushed between the folds, slowly worming its way into his channel. It was a tight fit at first, but Cliffjumper's actuators relaxed quickly, allowing the slimy tendril to push in further. 

He heard a gurgle from in front of him; blinked and turned his head, where a tentacle shoved itself into his mouth. Cliffjumper's optics widened; he could fell it move past his intake, deep into his throat, before thrusting--it moved in tandem with the tentacle pumping inside his channel. He just groaned, relaxed, and let the monster do its magic.

Mirage, however, was now hanging upside down, held by tentacles around his ankles keeping his legs spread. The tentacle in his channel was still going fast. "I--I told you!" he laughed, optics rolling back, a wide, slobbery smile on his face. "It was--wasn't gonna be s-so bad!" He broke off into giggles, chanting a mantra of yesyesyes with each thrust of the tentacle.

Another tentacle wiggled its away over, down his chest and neck. Mirage gagged, his laughing cut abruptly with the tentacle pushing past his lips, down his throat. It was big, too big, it strained his mouth to open wide to accommodate. But, just as his channel was stretched, this, too, didn't seem to hurt. Mirage's optics went lidded again, his hums vibrating wet and sloppy against the tentacle rolling inside his mouth.

The tentacle in Cliffjumper's channel was now pounding furiously, jolting and rocking the Minibot hard. Each thrust punctuated with a groan or loud whimper around the tentacle down his throat. He felt a quick brush to his unit before another tendril wrapped around it again, tugging and pulling. Cliffjumper's keen was muffled; he threw himself forward in surprise.

And still the aliens did nothing; not a peep, immobile.

Cliffjumper was spread out on a flat surface of the slime, hands freed. He dug and tore into the bright green fluid surrounding him, fucking him, tearing uselessly. The tentacle was still in his channel; another rolled around, vibrating against his hooded node. 

"F-Fffrag!" Cliffjumper spit out, optics flashing. He watched the tentacles, occasionally rolling his hips and helping them along.

Snapping out of his daze for a moment, Cliffjumper looked for Mirage. Mirage had been lowered on the ground, face down and on his knees, aft raised and presented. Two tentacles were wriggling inside his channel, and Cliffjumper could almost see inside of him. Too high up, however, but he could clearly see the smile on Mirage's face, the peek of his tongue, as he glanced back over his shoulder and cried for moremoremore.

Tentacles flipped Mirage on his back; he squealed as the tendrils rolled inside his channel with him. One holding him up earlier bowed down meekly above his face. Mirage reached out shaky hands, holding the tentacle, pulling it closer so he could lick and suckle on its edge. The tentacle quivered; as if impatient, it flew through Mirage's cupped hands and deep into his mouth, until the armor down his throat bulged.

Cliffjumper panted. "M-Mirage..." He almost wished he was the one in Mirage's mouth right now. The mech kneeling before him, sucking his unit, while the tentacles took care of their channels. Yes, that sounded nice about now.

But maybe later; right now, this was fine. More than fine, but not a word he could think of.

Cliffjumper howled as the tentacle suddenly pushed past its limits, so deep he could feel a shallow brush against his t-cog. The tentacle was working its way carefully up through his frame, around mechanics, organs. And what felt like a tickle at first, Cliffjumper gasped before that same tentacle was now sliding out of his mouth. It started thrusting again, through his entire body; oddly enough, it didn't hurt. 

But damn had it been quite the surprise.

When Cliffjumper next opened his optics, tentacles were carrying a limp, quivering Mirage over to him. He blinked tiredly, charge building; he needed to overload, but the tentacle was removing itself, pulling out his mouth, back out his channel. Too short-lived, he thought, what a pity.

"Nnh--"

Mirage was dropped in front of Cliffjumper on the same flat surface of slime. Mirage weakly got onto his knees and elbows, peering up at Cliffjumper with that droopy smile. Cliffjumper didn't know what was going on, but Mirage crawled forward, between the Minibot's legs held open by the tentacles.

Cliffjumper gasped. Mirage grabbed at the base of his unit, taking the whole, chubby little thing into his mouth. He started sucking, hard, cheeks hollowing as his lips dragged up and down the length of the unit. The tentacle that carried Mirage fumbled around the blue Autobot's channel before sliding inside, and Mirage's surprised cry vibrated through the cord in his mouth.

Cliffjumper shuddered. W-Wait--he was just--

A tentacle thrusting inside his channel shut him up. He decided not to question it; how this slime seemed to have read his thoughts. Not really interesting. 

Cliffjumper rode down on the tentacle while pumping inside Mirage's mouth, hips bucking; he held onto the taller bot's head, keeping him in place. Every now and then Mirage would moan from the tentacle in his own channel, releasing more of those delightful vibrations.

Suddenly, the Mucous below were hollering again. Cliffjumper looked down, only seeing blurry figures. The king rose to his feet, pointing his staff high in the air. The crowd waved their hands and cheered.

A second later, the slime monster gurgled loud enough to shake both Mirage and Cliffjumper. Mirage sat up, still holding the unit; he looked around, blinking, confused.

Cliffjumper saw the large spheres of dark liquid moving through the tentacles first. And then, with an eruptive growl, the slime monster orgasmed. Its cum filled the two mechs, each crying aloud with the creature. 

The alien semen filled them completely; metal and armor along their mid-sections buckled, expanding a few inches. Cliffjumper's tank stretched, aching.

All at once, their own overloads were triggered. Cliffjumper spent his load on Mirage's face, smearing it in purple transfluid. Mirage opened his mouth, catching a few ribbons hungrily, swallowing eagerly.

The Mucous people went quiet.

The aphrodisiac was wearing off, as if right on time. Tentacles slithered out of their channels, lowering the Autobots and laying them out on the ground. 

Mirage clutched his small belly, curious. He looked over to Cliffjumper. "Are--are you all right?" he sniffled, wiping transfluid from his optics.

Cliffjumper nodded weakly. "Had b-better," he snorted, and Mirage laughed tiredly.

The noise of the rustling crowd caught their attention. The king stood first, then his subjects. He walked down from his platform, and went into a kneeling position. The others followed, until they were all kneeling--to Cliffjumper and Mirage.

No, wait. That didn't make any sense.

The slime monster, however, started gurgling again. To their amazement, it was starting to... shrink. Compacting, shifting, folding up; it was interesting to watch. It eventually reached their size before taking on a familiar form.

Mirage reached over, helping Cliffjumper sit up, both still draining their swollen bellies.

The slime monster had transformed, funnily enough, into a feminine looking humanoid. A pair of eyes appeared, vivid blue, then thin lips. The slime changed colors, appearing as if it were wearing a gown which was also a part of its body. A matching blue like its eyes, skin still that slimy green.

"Dear Cybertronian guests. Friends. Now that we've finished with the pleasure," the Queen said, grinning smugly and spreading her arms, "let's get down to business."

**Author's Note:**

> (The aphrodisiac was not intended to force them into the act, but as a bonus and to help make the experience more fun. Obviously, it waited for consent before doing anything. Just wanted to clear that up!)


End file.
